Welcome to Democrats on the couch I’m your host, Michelle Deen, a family therapist turned political strategist. As with patients on an analyst’s couch, I’m here to bring sense and sanity to Democrats and their strategy.

I thought I’d start by telling you my story–how in the world a family therapist became involved in political strategy. 

I’m clearly not your typical D.C. strategist, and as it turns out, I think this is exactly what the doctor has ordered. 

Those enmeshed in DC dynamics—the politicians, pundits, all the way down to party hacks—are so deep in the forest–they can’t see the trees. I offer a perspective they simply don’t–and frankly–can’t have.

I consider myself an accidental activist.

How I arrived here, doing what I’m doing was entirely incidental–born from a Democratic Party need that wasn’t being met, and from my unique background that gave me knowledge those in the Beltway don’t have.

Let me start by saying, before 9/11, I was completely apolitical. I had no interest in politics whatsoever. 

I woke up to politics with the Twin Towers collapsing in flames along with my naiveté. Suddenly, all was not well in my fairytale world. But more to the point, all must not have been well in American government to become a target of such a vicious and utterly devastating attack.

I began to pay attention. 

While I woke up to a passion for politics on 9/11, I woke up to righteous outrage when it was revealed that G.W. Bush and his administration had waged war in Iraq under false pretenses, claiming Iraq had weapons of mass destruction that were an imminent threat to America. It was a devious and immoral con for a covert political agenda that has killed 100’s of thousands of Iraqis—most of them civilians——––easily classifiable as a war crime of the highest order—

And then we have the death and maiming of tens of thousands U.S. soldiers –political pawns in this sick and twisted plot that to this day makes my stomach turn. 

Then to add fuel to the fire burning inside me, Bush and Cheney were re-elected as president and vice president of the United States, 

 I thought: How in the flippin’ hell did this happen, in this country??

They and the other caught red-handed criminals of the Bush Administration were not only spared from indictment, they were re-anointed, as if by divine right, to lead our country to god knows where.

It made no sense. It wasn’t right, and I wanted to get to the bottom of it…

I call this –THE GREAT HOODWINKING OF AMERICA…

I began studying and became obsessed with Republican campaign strategies and rhetoric. Thanks to the work of George Lakoff and others, “family values” was pinpointed as the powerfully persuasive propaganda that propelled the Republican agenda from the Reagan years forward, peaking in 2004 with the re-election of G.W. Bush.

The fight for family values was folded into a general culture war narrative that painted Republicans as moral patriots out to protect our nation from an amoral, anti-family, anti-religious and anti-American force — the Democratic Party. Their concocted “culture wars” were an ingenious divide-and-conquer strategy that served to defeat Democrats time and again by pitting Democrats against America’s heartland and the values they hold most dear.

During Bush’s 2004 re-election campaign, the Republican Party super-charged the culture war by exploiting the hotly controversial issue of the time — same sex marriage. 

They incited fear and divided our nation into warring factions by claiming gay marriage (which the Democratic Party supported) would demolish traditional family values, families would disintegrate, and civilization would be destroyed. (Yes, they actually said this.) The message: If you care about your children, their moral upbringing, and our country’s future, vote Republican.

This cunning rhetoric did two things that helped Bush get re-elected. 

First, it took the focus off his administration’s dirty deeds and the diabolical war that was raging in Iraq. 

Secondly, it drove what became known as “values voters” to the polls in droves. From rural gun-owners to suburban soccer moms, parents of our nation’s children were joined together by that which they most valued — the welfare of their children and the moral tone of the culture in which they were raising them.

Once again, the Republican Party stoked fear and rallied citizen through deception. But this time the contrived weapons of mass destruction were gay lovebirds wanting to marry, and the lies involved my area of expertise — healthy family life. 

As a family therapist specializing in child development, WHICH INCLUDES MORAL DEVELOPMENT, I saw right through the Republican Party’s complete DUPING of the American people, and had had it. Not. On. My. Watch.

Even though I’m as straight as the hair on my head, I was not going to silently stand by as gay people were being scapegoated as immoral threats to our country, especiallyby an administration so corrupt it was literally getting away with murder. No siree. No more pointing fingers at gays, Democrats, or secular values as the moral evil to be conquered for the good of all Americans.

While the Democratic Party did not know how to get out from under the role of moral villains that was sabotaging them at the polls again and again, I did. I decided to call Republicans out on their deceit and set the record straight, once and for all. 

This led me to write: Saving America’s Grace: Rethinking Family Values, Moral Politics, and the Culture War. <WHICH CAN BE FOUND ON AMAZON>

This book deconstructs the Republican Party’s BULLSHIT moral narrative from every angle, including what real family values ought to entail, and what moral values in politics and our culture ought to look like. (Clearly, Republicans aren’t the role models here.) 

The book was prescient, addressing the BREAKDOWN OF CHARACTER IN POLITCS AND OUR CULTURE before Trump even stepped foot in the White House. However, what Saving America’s Grace did not do was provide a moral narrative to be strategically used by Democrats.

The demand for a moral narrative was mounting. Media contacts were telling my publicist it was this that they wanted. Democratic Party leaders, pundits and operatives had repeatedly admitted they needed a moral narrative—for over a decade since the EARLY Bush years–yet no strategist had provided it. 

I thought…why in the hell NOT and what in the hell are they doing, sitting around watching

Republicans whoopin’ Democrats’ @ss in election after election due to the lack of it. Then, when Donald Trump landed in the White House, and I had really had it. Beside myself with indignation, I began to write a moral narrative that could be used by the Democratic Party. 

I was pulled into analyzing and developing campaign strategy by a force greater than myself. I simply could not NOT do it . 

And let me tell you, this, along with my book, is the most satisfying thing I’ve ever done for no other reason than it HAD to be done. No pay. No acknowledgment. Nothing. Living life from a place of purpose and principle is incredibly satisfying.

It’s high time that our political leaders begin to reflect the importance of principles to drive them and their purpose in government.

Not Money. Not ego. Not politics. Not re-election. Principle, but that’s for another podcast episode all together.

Campaigning in the Midst of Deep Divides

As I started to dig into the issues from a Democratic campaign standpoint, I began listening to what “the other side” had to say, just as I was trained to do as a family therapist. 

I had long drawn out conversations with people, many of them I consider friends, who are intelligent, informed, “good people” yet who also had a lot of “bones to pick” with the Democratic Party some of who had even voted for Donald Trump.

I consider their views not just valid but valuable. By actually listening to their viewpoints,   I began to see the weaknesses within the party and between the party and the public’s perception of the party that needed to be addressed. 

I realized Democrats needed more than just a moral narrative. They needed :

1) strategies to strengthen the underlying weaknesses and mend the divisions that decades of culture wars have created, as well as 

2) insights into the kind of leadership necessary to unite our country, connect with voters, and actually “walk the talk” that this moral narrative espoused.

That’s when my 5-point strategy was born, infused with a narrative that grounds the party in a meaningful and stirring cause while tackling the grave disconnect between the Democratic Party and Middle America. 

I’ve written this up in a not-yet-released white paper called “Make America  America: The Stand the Democratic Party Must to take, the Story they need to Tell ,and the Leadership the Leadership they Have to Find: A Strategy for Success. 

This strategy can best be summed up as a “UNITE to Conquer” plan and as it turns out, my clinical expertise as a family therapist could not be better suited to the task…

Consider: We have political parties brawling like the most dysfunctional of families, complete with all the classic characteristics that predict breakdown. spell disaster and Let me know any of these dynamics sound familiar in our dysfunctional House on Capitol Hill….

They are: Power struggles. Poor communication. Triangulation. Blame. Contempt. Criticism. Stonewalling. Zero empathy. <Any of these strike a chord ??> 

And like helpless children in troubled families, neglected citizens <us> have been acting out  our anger and despair the only way they know how — by joining in the brawl going on around us.

We’re all swept up in the dysfunction, from politicians in the highest offices —to media personalities and outlets with the greatest reach–all the way down to citizens in the smallest towns—which, quite frankly, was the Republican Party’s goal all along. Republicans figured out long ago that if they can divide the majority, they can control the majority and serve the interests of the affluent 1% .  

While this strategy has been good for the Republican agenda, it’s killing our democracy…and our decency as a nation.

The candidate and party that can best handle the politics of division by uniting Americans around a common cause <which by the way, the Democratic Party has NOT identified, defined or put forth>> will be the candidate and party to capture the faith, loyalty and enthusiastic support of American voters, and get our country back on track. 

Granted, it’s no easy task to unite those pitted against one another… this is where my insights and training as a family therapist come in handy. 

Being able to see all sides of an argument, manage heated conflicts, and resolve hostile divisions resulting from competing needs are just as critical to navigating today’s highly polarized political environment as dealing with family discord. 

While getting deep into the issues of the day and drawing on historically relevant facts and lessons, I offer advice on:

1) how to unify the Democratic Party;

2) how Democrats can become the “Party of the People” once again; 

3) how to handle “identity politics” that are alienating Middle America; 

4) how Democrats can effectively lead to inspire Americans and bring citizens together; 

and 5) the most immediate problem—how to handle the psychopathology that is Donald J. Trump.

As I lay out advice on how to strengthen the Democratic Party, I’d like to take a minute to discuss partisanship. 

A good friend who listened to my recent trailer took issue when I stated that my aim was to “empower Democrats to take charge of the fate of our nation.” He thought taking “a side” would interfere with bringing people together to improve our country.

I do admit, I’m on a “side” but as you will quickly see if you haven’t already, I am NOT blind to the Democratic Party’s egregious flaws and fatal weaknesses—and I totally “get” Middle America’s numerous complaints about those on the Left. 

However, personally I think the Democratic Party is more workable than Republicans IFthey can get over the holier-than-thou, smarter-than-thou, righter-than-thou attitudes they hold. And if they can’t, it will be this that hamstrings the Democratic Party and brings them more defeat.

Why I have taken Democrats “side” –if you will– is because I believe Democratic leadership for the most part, unlike Republican leadership do fundamentally believe in serving the common good of common people. And yes, they often undermine these principles and their credibility as they kiss corporate asses all the way to their campaign coffers. My aim is to work on this disconnect, which is point 5 in my five-point strategy, by the way.

BUT The way I see it—Dems simply need to get in alignment with their values. Whereas, Republicans flat out, don’t give a damn about serving the common good of the average American.

Why do I think this? The years of research I’ve done showing how Republicans have intentionally, strategically used “divide to conquer” for decades to overtake the interests of the majority in order to serve corporations and the wealthy eilite at American citizens expense. 

Mind you, none of this is REALLY about RED VS. BLUE, left vs. right, or Democrats vs. Republicans. 

The fight before us is The fight is for the common good, VS. the good of the 1% and don’t let anyone distract you from this reality.  

This is why income inequality is such a huge problem today.

Since the Reagan years, when the principles of trickle down economics, (i.e. tax cuts for the wealthy, deregulation, and the like) took hold, there has been a titanic transfer of wealth from the middle class to the wealthiest people in the country, creating economic inequality of gross proportions. This is not rhetoric. This is fact. 

We’ve had three decades of rising income inequality so severe that the United States is now on par with former communist Russia in terms of the gap between our nation’s richest and poorest citizens. 

Extreme income inequality is facing middle and working class Americans to a degree not seen since the beginning of the Great Depression.  And this is before the pandemic struck.

Both Democrats and Republicans have gotten way off track, by pandering to corporations. In fact, in this regard, Democrats are actually more hypocritical than Republicans. 

Bottom line —we need to put people over profits, principles over politics, and progress over party ideology. I’m riding on Democrats for this…we’ll see what they are made of and if they can rise to the occasion.

The strategy I propose is not about duping people in order to “beat Republicans” 

But how to get our government back on track starting with straightening out the Democratic Party. 

It’s my pleasure to offer political consulting with a counseling touch, providing a guide on how Democrats can build rapport, bridge divides and meaningfully reach people through all the fire and fury.

It’s the only way for the Democratic Party to get back in favor with Middle America, rally voters to hold our politicians accountable, and create a unified movement to save our democracy. Then, we just might be able to make America, America—a country with a government of, by and for the people, not the powerful. 

Let’s get to it.

Will you join me? I sure as hell hope so. 

Send me a message with your thoughts and ideas. 

Share this podcast on your social media OR any way you can. 

Write a review on apple podcasts, it will help bring this program greatly.

And to help me keep going, please consider contributing to my Patreon account found on my podcast website…Democrats on the Couch. 

Blue skies are ahead, my friends. Don’t give up. Take good care and talk to you soon….   

xxxx